photo: Paul Wade
Today's letter features an enclosure, which is always exciting. Specifically, we had some Filipino pesos issued by the occupying Japanese government.
They're rather eerily American in appearance - the type of paper and the colour scheme.
They remind me of the time Jack took me out into the garage in my grandparents' house and showed me coins he'd brought back from the Philippines. He made a show of having washed dirt off of them, as if they'd been buried.
I'm tired today. It's been busy. It seems weird to think of there being anything approaching a relentless pace at the moment, but it has been rather on the relentless end of the spectrum.
I struggle in moments like this - does one lean into the tiredness, write very little today, let it be what it is? Or is better to push on, to whatever's on the other side of that tiredness?
This degree of self-regulation - when to push, when not to - is something that feels very much of this time.
Time itself has a slippery quality these days.
Time doesn't feel slippery in the letters - that regimentedness of the military. I wonder if being in the service is in a way like a long run or a never-ending tech week, in the sense that you do what needs to be done and it's just so all-consuming that you don't really think about whether you should or shouldn't push yourself to do X. There isn't really space for personal considerations.
There is a part of me that likes the unambiguity of such situations.
I suppose I experience so much ambiguity - from how I experience myself to how I structure my time, there's so much that's in flux. Odd bouts of externally imposed structures are salutary.
Not enough to make me consider a career in the services, though. Obviously.
I'm struck by Jack's description at the start of this letter, of the going to see a stage production of Oklahoma that spent 4 days in their theatre in the Philippines. He had seen it in New York, with Winnie, and the letter is full of praise of the production - how similar to the New York one, how excellent, etc.
At the start of quarantine, I had a plan to show my partner all of the Hollywood musicals I loved as a child, when I would spend any day I stayed home sick from school watching the films in my Grandma Bicksler's collection.
I didn't get very far, but I did get to Oklahoma!
I love the extent to which so many of the films of this era are also stunning dance films. The dream sequence in this piece is remarkable.
Oklahoma! is one of my favourite of these films - I've also seen it live. I loved that Jack loved it. I loved that he thought Ado Annie stole the show. I love Ado Annie. I always thought I'd like to play if I ever somehow ended up in a production of the show.
I'm still tired, so I'm going to sign off now and leave you with these two moments form the film in lieu of further reflections from my drowsy self
Much love until next time